Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Should you check on her? - ARTICLE

Suppose you have doubts.

You have the feeling she is not telling you the truth.

Should you take action and dare for instance to check her emails or follow her after work?

Is it okay to spy on your partner?

The answer is yes.

But you need to be very careful with what you do and why you do it.

95% of obsessive jealousy situations are unfounded.

In fact, jealousy is often delusional.

You imagine things that don’t exist.

You interpret signs in an extreme way.

Basically, you distort reality.

Now, earlier I mentioned a few elements of what constitutes real cheating.

If you have doubts, it is effectively useful to check the facts and find out for yourself what the truth is.

Now, there are some very specific boundaries or limits you must respect.

Talk to her first!

Before you spy on your partner or do anything which invades her privacy, you must talk to her and ask her straight questions.

If you know that she is lying or get a feeling that something is wrong, I encourage you to take steps and check the facts.

Now, be very careful with how you interpret facts.

Finding a man’s phone number in her time planner is not a proof of cheating; it is simply a proof that she is in contact with another man.

Now, this is not cheating.

It is not a crime.

Spying or other similar steps must be taken only as a last resort.

Spying is something which can happen once exceptionally.

If your intention is to set up hidden cameras in your partner’s car for instance (just to be sure), this obviously crosses the line.

This is not a game. It is a last resort battle strategy aimed at defending your life and relationship.

It is better to verify doubts or feelings with real facts rather than letting them build up in your mind.

Get the answer and learn from it!